When I first became a single mom, my spirits plummeted.
I missed feeling like a family. My X’s little brothers lived with us at the time, and I really missed them. I missed the dreams I had for my X and I as a family with my daughter.
He got into a relationship within a month of us separating. I met the woman he married while I was pregnant with our daughter and noticed their chemistry instantly.
It was a REALLY hard time emotionally.
I would pick up my daughter after work from X and his new gf each day and there seemed to be always some emotional struggle for me. They made a family photo wall in the entryway, so I had to see photos of the three of THEM as a "happy family". Sometimes X would take our daughter out for a walk right before I got there (same time every day, people!) and I'd have to sit there waiting, after having been at work all day.
Then, I started suffering financially. I had lots of money saved when my boss lost his properties in foreclosure, so that was great, but now I was living off of my savings and working part time. In a short time, I dwindled my savings and was living from my part time job and my credit card.
It was around this time that I learned about the Law of Attraction. In hindsight, with all of these hardships going on in my personal life, it makes sense that the negativity would bleed into my work and financial life.
I watched The Secret. I discovered the Science of Mind by Ernest Holmes and started reading a little bit every day. This book helped me to really understand how my thoughts dictated my reality.
From these two sources and some new acquaintances I recently made, I understood just what I needed to do: Create what I want on the INSIDE in order to experience it on the OUTSIDE. I needed a SERIOUS mindset shift.
I tell you this long story because I felt inspired to share some ideas on “How to be abundant as a single mom”.
Some things I did:
1. Create affirmations and repeat them every time I went for a bike ride or any other time I could remember to do so. The first one I used for a VERY LONG TIME was : “ I am perfect, whole, and complete (AS I AM)” - I still use this one sometimes out of habit.
2. I wrote all the things I’m grateful for (or at least 10 a day)
3. I watched “The Secret”
4. I wrote down how I would spend $40k, $100k & more
5. I made feeling good my PRIORITY
6. I realized that the key to attracting abundance is FEELING abundant, so I did fun things that were cheap or free and made a point to FEEL like it is the most elegant, enjoyable, fun experience. Some of these things include:
a. Googling “Free music” “Free fair” “Free festival” + the state I live in. I would then go to these places with my daughter (sometimes inviting friends) and have the BEST time. I would get into enjoying HER FUN. I would always pack food and water so I didn’t have to buy anything.
b. I would take my daughter “out to dinner” at the local pizza place and order the “2 slices & a drink” special for under $5 and enjoy the shit out of that pizza. My daughter LOVED going to the pizza shop. It was really a great “night out”
c. I would invite friends over for dinner or offer to bring dinner to a friend’s place so we could have a playdate and enjoy kid-free time while our kids occupied each other.
d. I set an intention to have a very fun summer while also setting an intention to attract single mom friends. While "feeling good" and living my life, I met my STILL best friend who lives 70 minutes away at the beach. That summer I spent very little money, was at the beach every weekend drinking wine and making delicious food and having a blast. Now that I recount this story, around that time I "manifested" a free video camera and other products.
What are some things you can think of that make you feel abundant?
Ps. I was able to, over the course of the next year, get the exact job I wanted, making $10k more than I thought I would be offered. Then, after being there for 4 years, I left to start a new business having saved $30k in the process. I’m not rich, and I’m not famous (nor do I want to be), but I was able to achieve a feeling first, and then a reality of abundance by working on ME.
I offer this in the hopes that it helps someone who needs it.
Have the best day!